Night mormon girl!
‘police responded to a report of a child who was throwing toys at his parent. Police advised the parent on some parenting strategies.’ Oh how I love the statesman.
For serious. Go tap that right now! (why do I think I’m black all of a sudden?)
I may have already told you this, but I might accidentally become a jehovah’s witness simply because I can’t tell the sweet old ladies no.
Does anyone care if I tentatively reserve the living room for Friday night? I’m planning a make-out session.
Well I just fell off an 8 ton anchor, saved my camera from sure destruction and sustained multiple injuries. There was blood.
Darn it all to heck.
You should come. We could have a synchronized puking day.
Oh I have stories for you. Now that I’m not married I guess I wear a sign that says touch me inappropriately.
Good deal you can get a new phone and still have money left over for beers.
Or a mango. (sidebar. My dad thought that he bought a mango the other day. But it had the consistency of a potato.) - we still don't know what he bought...
Than being gnawed to death by a pack of feral ceramic cats?
Uh. Your dad is texting me?
Hold up. A dancing penguin?! I hope you made out with him!
Well your birthday was yesterday…I think that warrants at least one poor long term decision.
Wow. A fat cowboy on a longboard. That’s not something you see every day.
Really, I think Mormon missionaries could learn something from Jehovah's Witness missionaries. They are waaaay too nice.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm still sad you didn't make out with the dancing penguin.